ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: 7 Questions that Reveal If You’re Succeeding or Failing

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: 7 Questions that Reveal If You’re Succeeding or Failing

It’s very common to question yourself whether you’re on the path to success or not. Feelings of “do I really have what it takes or am I just deluding myself” can creep into your otherwise confident and positive mindset. It’s normal. Questioning oneself is a healthy sign. It shows humility and a willingness to see truth and grow.

However, a habit of doubting yourself without taking action on the truth of what the answers reveal, creates stagnation and an unhealthy state of being causing damage to ones’ ability to achieve self-esteem, confidence, personal growth and success.

The most successful people in life are the ones who ask questions.  They’re always learning. They’re always growing. They’re always pushing. ~Robert Kiyosaki

Are you a constant self-doubter or a self-doer? The most successful people understand that knowledge without putting it into action is useless. So, even if you are a seeker who is good at asking the right questions and getting answers, without application, the wealth of information received has no utility in helping you to achieve personal and professional success.

Before you go further in this post asking yourself the 7 questions that will reveal if you are on the path to success or failure, first answer these two prerequisite questions:

1. Are you a constant seeker of information who doesn’t put what you’ve learned into action in your own life?

2. Does your mind regularly and unintentionally drift to questioning yourself wherein you immediately push down or avoid addressing the question?

An honest appraisal of your ability to face truth and reality head on is the first step to being able to utilize your innate intelligence to move you out of stagnation and into attaining success in all areas of your life.

Now, if you can honestly answer no to the above or have answered yes and are willing and ready to move out of self-denial and into self-made success, then go ahead and answer the below questions that will further reveal if you’re taking yourself down the path to success or failure.

 Ask Yourself These 7 Questions to See If You’re on The Path to Success or Failure:

1. Do I believe I don’t need others to succeed?

2. Do I regularly need to be right and insist on having my way?

3. Do I care more about competing against others than myself?

4. Do I think I don’t need to invest in my own personal growth?

5. Do I feel I don’t have time for rest, friends or family?

6. Do I spend more time nurturing my bank balance than my relationships?

7. Do I fail to express empathy for others struggles, challenges and concerns?

If you’ve answered yes to one or more of the above, then you’ve entered the danger zone. It’s time to hit the pause button and take a time out to remember your values, re-prioritize your activities, and adjust your habits and actions to set you back on track to being a successful person.

Asking without answering is self-denial. Seeking knowledge without application is a waste of valuable energy. Doing without thinking is self-sabotage.

To become a success and stay a success, one must routinely ask themselves what they could be doing better, and then act on the answer.

In Closing My Shocking Confession: I kept asking myself the same one question over and over, and year after year. Was this partnership right for me? And, each year I kept coming up with the same answer. Yes, it’s OK. Why, then was I experiencing more and more discontent? Finally, after a particularly challenging year in this partnership, I thought to question my “It’s OK” answer. What did “Ok” mean? I decided it was time to take it out of my head and get it onto paper. I drew up “the list”. You know the one. The pros and cons list. The result was that the pros side was very long and on the con side—1 single entry. Well, then, it would seem the landslide justified my inaction. But, upon further questioning of each item, what I realized was that the 1 single con represented my most cherished value. I had my answer, and it was time to take action. And, I did.

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: Be Humbly & Hugely Successful

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: Be Humbly & Hugely Successful

Super Sized Success is attained and sustained by those who possess specific character qualities. It’s been proven, time and time again, that focusing on becoming more rather than having more, is critical to the achievement of optimal wealth and well-being. Essentially, becoming what I call “inside rich” is the key to becoming ultra-successful.

What’s so awesome about having a primary goal of becoming “inside rich” is that virtually anyone can achieve it. There is zero external barrier to attaining it. You do not need an education, money or even a business to become inside rich. All you need is one character quality to achieve it. That virtue is HUMILITY.

Contrary to the belief that humility renders a person powerless, it infuses one with great physical and mental strength, instilling an ability to persevere and succeed amidst challenges, obstacles and opposition. Humility is the ultimate shield of self-protection. Without it’s shelter, it leaves one vulnerable to failure.

“Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.” Mathew 23:12

Humility is an insurance policy protecting one’s very important personal assets to success: inner peace, mental, physical, spiritual and financial well-being. Without protecting these invaluable assets, one’s pride and ego step in to overrun the show. Ego run riot causes it to rain ruin rather than reign success.

Our greatest opportunity for success lies in living a humble life free from false pride and pretense. Mere words cannot express the sheer magnitude of the important role that humility plays in achieving and sustaining success.

Here Are the Top Ten Ways to Become Humbly and Hugely Successful:

1. Do not seek attention or admiration

2. Do not be concerned what others think of you. Only care what your higher power thinks of you

3. Fight off all forms of pride

4. Do not fear criticism. Use it to your advantage to correct personal faults or flaws

5. Do not compare yourself to others

6. Be impressed only by your servant leadership ability and ability to stay humble

7. Refuse to fight over unimportant matters

8. Remember, silence often carries more power than words

9. Seek not to judge, but to understand

10. See commonalities and not differences

By thinking, walking and talking humility in all your affairs, you will be gracefully guided to greater self-awareness, personal development, creativity, compassion, intuitive intelligence, and a positive mental attitude; making you “inside rich” for the attainment of Super Sized Success.

In Closing My Shocking Confession: I was having a rough week where nothing seemed to be getting done well enough or fast enough. I started to compare my accomplishments with others who have gone before me…I was getting moody and irritable…thinking I would never achieve the degree of positive impact that I aspired to. I caught myself real quick and went to meditate to self-correct my stinking thinking. I asked one question before commencing meditation: What would you have me do differently? I set the timer for 30 min and went deep. When the timer chimed, I had a very clear cut and concise answer: “Do not care about the impact you will have. Care only about doing the work. Caring about impact is the ego. Caring only about doing the work is the divine.” Wow! Blew me away! I hope it does you too.

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: To Thine Own Action Be True

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: To Thine Own Action Be True

The Success Gurus #1 gold standard advice for achieving success is to take massive action. They further advise prior to commencing taking action to specifically know: 1) the result you want to achieve 2) your purpose for wanting to attain it 3) the date you will achieve it by, and 4) the steps you will take. After jotting all down, you’re ready, set and go.

By now, everyone who has been on a quest for success has heard, and most likely followed this noteworthy advice. Yet, despite having followed it, aren’t satisfied with the success they’ve achieved. And, thus, often left suffering from feelings of failure. But, that simply is not the truth. The truth is that the formula has failed the person, not the person who has failed.

This traditional RX for success has neglected to include one massively important ingredient. That ingredient is Truth. You see, Truth is the one ingredient that makes each person unique. It’s the one ingredient that customizes and individualizes the RX for success. Otherwise, the RX is a generic, non-specific formulae that doesn’t take each person’s unique Truth into account. Well, no wonder why the formula doesn’t work very expediently or effectively!

Taking massive action works to attain super sized, sustainable success only when the actions taken are consistent with the truth of who you are.

shakespeare

Personal authenticity is what makes you special and comprises the unique offering you possess to gift upon the world and is your divined destiny to fulfil. Thus, it goes to reason, that any action taken (let alone massive action) devoid of the truth of who you are, is dissociative and disrupts one’s ability to attain and sustain success. Well, that’s a whole lot of wasted effort if you ask me!

Now that I’ve driven home the importance of applying personal authenticity to every action taken, there is an imperative add-on, that if not used in conjunction with authenticity, will cause all that energy expended to take massive action, to be ineffectual.  That add-on is this: to be both truthful and authentic.  These twin truths when combined provide the missing ingredient to the typical standard advice on how to achieve success.

Taking massive action becomes effective and speeds your time to success when you are being:

1.  Authentic. Living out the truth of who you are at your core.

2.  Truthful. Walking and talking the truth. Making decisions and taking actions that are consistent with truth not fabrication.

So, yes, go ahead and make “take massive action” your standard for success, but make “Truth” your gold standard of loyalty to yourself and all those you serve to achieve the super sized success that you desire and deserve.

In closing my shocking confession: I really believed I was going to knock it out the park! I took massive action and got the big job. I was thrilled. I was on my way to achieving my financial goal. Thrilled turned into derailed, when, I was like, WTF! I’m not happy and I’m not liking what I’m seeing, hearing or doing. I had just realized being a corporate spy was totally not me. Was it cool? Yes. Did it pay a lot? Yes. Is corporate spying a norm in America, yes. I hated it and myself for doing it. I took immediate action and quit.  My next action step was to take a time out to rediscover my inner truth, my authentic self (as corny as it all sounds) so that I could go on to take constructive rather than destructive massive action. I learned that massive action absent of truth is fruitless DOING. And, a loyalty to truth guarantees BEING a success.

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: GOT GRIT? How to Get the Courage You Need to Succeed

ON THE COUCH: Shocking Confessions of a Self-Made Millionaire: GOT GRIT? How to Get the Courage You Need to Succeed

There is no doubt that attaining success in any and every area of life takes courage.  Courage is the inner strength that is mustered up to move one up and out of a place of fear and immobility into action.

It’s important to understand the difference between Action versus Reaction. It takes courage to take action. Action is positive proactive movement towards attaining one’s desired outcomes and borne out of rational analysis.  Reaction conversely, characterizes a lack of courage. It is a loss of impulse control, and is a state of over-emotionalism and irrationalism.

Success is the result of having the ability to control your behavior so that all your actions taken are a result of a conscious decision to live courageously. Living courageously means making a commitment to yourself to behave reasonably, rationally, and consistently, both internally and externally, to rigorously honor the truth of your own self, convictions, values and goals.

Here are the 8 Attributes You Need to Have the Courage to Succeed:

  1. Be Truthful. The saying “Then you will know Truth, and the Truth will set you free” is probably the most profound prophetic statement of how to achieve a successful life. The Truth is the laser that breaks through all emotional blindness, breaks down barriers and shines a light on the way forward to success. Think, speak, and act the truth.
  2. Embrace Change. Change is constant, whether we like it or not. You can be an agent and victor of change or the victim of someone else’s ability to cause change. Successful people chose to be a positive agent of change in their own and others’ lives.
  3. Be Okay with Saying No. “No” is a complete sentence. It takes courage not to people please, but it is necessary to say no to what isn’t a fit for you, your values and goals. A fear of saying no is a fear of rejection. But if you reject yourself, you’re rejecting courage and success.
  4. Live the Life of Your Own Choosing. Doesn’t succumb to the expectations of others on how they should live their own life.
  5. Take Calculated Risks. Takes well-thought out, researched risks. One who does not take calculated risks cannot progress. Smart risk taking gets easier with each risk taken. The key is to take that first leap of faith.
  6. Be Willing to Be and Do Different. Those who succeed the most at life are those who are bold in allowing themselves to be different and do things differently than those who have gone before them. The rewards for daring to be different are countess in both inner and outer riches.
  7. Endurance. Have the determination to keep going no matter what. Lives by the slogan “rest if you must, but don’t you quit”. Doesn’t count how many times they get knocked down, but how many times they get up.
  8. Faith. At the end of the day, courage takes faith. Faith comes from consciously connecting to a supreme power source that provides inspiration, motivation and a promise that if you do the right thing, positive outcomes are guaranteed.

  “Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” –John Wayne, an icon of True Grit

In Closing my shocking confession: I was scared to death. My battery of top advisors was telling me to give in to the demands of a mega corporation in spite of their fraudulent and bullying behavior. My shocked rebuttal was “but, but… that would be accepting the unacceptable and would embolden them to continue to do this to others.” I told them I had to do the “right thing”. Advisors told me that it would “ruin” me in every way and rob me of all my financial resources. I sat in prayer and meditation. I knew I had to do the right thing no matter what and have the faith that “the truth would set me free.” I took the bold and shocking move that many others did not have the courage to take. I exposed the behavior of the responsible person to the utmost regulating authority. I waited…there were more threats, more bullying.  I held strong. Then, the miracle happened. The person was fired from a top tier tenured executive position by the founder of the company! I received an outpouring of thanks from those within the company. Not only had clients of the company endured this unacceptable behavior, but so had the other employees in the company! I didn’t lose. I won. Courage paid off, not only for me, but countless others.